We suffer that we comfort those who suffer

July 31st, 2012 by webmaster

I apologise for being somewhat melancholic; however, I received a phone call informing me that my grandmother (maternal side) has 2-4 weeks to live. The sadness is compounded by the fact she will not receive visitors, which is entirely consistent with her reclusive lifestyle. Only once in the last 12 years have I successfully obtained permission to visit, and that was so she could meet my son. Sadly he was too young to remember meeting her and despite my best efforts in the past, he will never get to meet her again, and neither will I.

My grandmother is quite a character coming from Romany Gypsy stock, and her husband is younger than my mum. She’s been plagued with lifelong mental ‘issues’ which appear to run through the female side of the family, with me as the exception. Although, I must add that I know nothing of the paternal side of my family.

Anyway, I came across a website featuring quotes on suffering. Here’s a few I thought poignant:

“We have all sufficient strength to endure the misfortunes of others”
François de la Rochefoucauld

“The aim of the wise is not to secure pleasure, but to avoid pain.”
Aristotle

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation. A stereotyped but unconscious despair is concealed even under what are called the games and amusements of mankind.”
Henry David Thoreau

“I cannot believe that the inscrutable universe turns on an axis of suffering; surely the strange beauty of the world must somewhere rest on pure joy!”
Louise Bogan

“Mysteriously and in ways that are totally remote from natural experience, the gray drizzle of horror induced by depression takes on the quality of physical pain.”
William Styron

“The greatest griefs are those we cause ourselves.”
Sophocles

“Don’t look forward to the day you stop suffering, because when it comes you’ll know you’re dead.”
Tennessee Williams

I’ll stop there.

Let me know if you find any particularly incisive. Feel free to share quotations from other sources.

I’ll kick off with a quotation paraphrased from the Bible which encapsulates the purpose of suffering for me:

We suffer that we may comfort those who suffer.

And it seems Mother Theresa touched on this principle:

“One must really have suffered oneself to help others.”

And this is of course, the very concept of the Wounded Healer.

And is this perhaps the culmination of suffering?

“I have suffered too much in this world not to hope for another.”
Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Posted in Webmaster's Ramblings | 5 comments

Previous post:
Next post:

5 comments on this post.

  1. Lisa Graas:

    July 31st, 2012 at 4:52 pm

    I am sorry for your pain, as I have had a similar experience, but I rejoice in knowing that it means you are close to Jesus at the Foot of the Cross. I think that the quote from Aristotle is wrong. Our aim should be in doing God’s will. The quote from Louise Bogan, too, is wrong, because there is joy in suffering, provided one understands the love of Jesus hanging on the Cross for us.

    Your headline is right but the Passionists would tell you, as I do, that it is more than being able to comfort others. Suffering happens because of the Fall of Man…..but Jesus has made it redemptive. That is where the joy is.

    I’m sorry I’m so textbookish…but I don’t know how else really to communicate. I will pray for you and for your whole family.

  2. Goy:

    July 31st, 2012 at 8:33 pm

    Please no need for melancholy when the privilege to have experienced the consciousness of life even momentary outweighs any associated suffering.

  3. webmaster:

    July 31st, 2012 at 9:08 pm

    You reminded me of this Scripture Goy:

    For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.

    Romans 8:18

  4. Dylan:

    July 31st, 2012 at 11:44 pm

    Please be assured of my prayers for you, your grandmother and your family.

    Here are two of my favourite Biblical passages on suffering: -

    “For it has been granted to you on behalf of Christ not only to believe in him, but also to suffer for him…” (Philippians 1:29)

    “I am now rejoicing in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I am completing what is lacking in Christ’s afflictions for the sake of his body, that is, the Church.” (Col 1:24)

    Oremus pro invicem.

    Dylan

  5. Lisa Graas:

    August 1st, 2012 at 1:30 am

    Hope you’re doing okay.