I have been taking a small break from church website developing today and have been looking at one of my favourite websites The Spurgeon Archives. I came across this lovely quote from Charles Spurgeon:-
“I do not come into this pulpit hoping that perhaps somebody will of his own free will return to Christ. My hope lies in another quarter. I hope that my Master will lay hold of some of them and say, “You are mine, and you shall be mine. I claim you for myself.” My hope arises from the freeness of grace, and not from the freedom of the will.”
I love this quote, but from experience I know many Christians wouldn’t!
I’m being bold to say this but I am very Calvinistic in my theology, I do believe in predestination and feel that I could present a good case for this belief from the Bible, but in truth, it is just as much from my own salvation experience.
I was not raised in a Christian home and God was never mentioned and the Bible viewed as something akin to fable, myth and Chinese whispers. I believed that Christians were weak minded and probably self deceived. I did encounter some Christians growing up and they seemed to have an answer for everything, but none of their testimonies penetrated my mind which was set on the social sciences. I went to university to study social sciences and was amazed to find that these disciplines seemed to raise more questions than they answered!
From meeting Christians, I did envy their foolish thinking and in some senses wished I could believe as I certainly could see the benefit in believing in a God who you could pass responsibility over to and even remember saying that I wish I could believe (I think this is the most powerful prayer that there is), but I was far to intelligent to believe all of that stuff about God and Jesus Christ.
Much to my disgust one day my (then future) wifey invited Christians around and they spoke of the Bible (which I had never read) and explained the fall of the human race in Adam and it was like a light bulb going off in my head. In one moment I realised that the Bible had not been written by man and that it explained the dreadful state of human affairs.
It is amazing to me (even now) that I suddenly believed after all of the predjudices I had and can literally only explain this in terms of a Divine revalation.
I believe God had predestined me to believe and become one of His children. Do I understand all of this? Not really, but I do agree wholeheartedly with Spurgeon that God laid hold of me by His free grace and I was most certainly not deserving!